Yes, I agree that start with the first part of #2...leave out the tying to the bedpost stuff!
I'd like to comment about your W's expressed view about envying dead people. There's underlying stress she's feeling and has not verbalized out loud to you. If I were you, I'd ask her opened ended questions to get more out of her in a nonjudgmental manner. Remember, MLCers are overwhelmed with stress and don't handle pressure well. Dead people don't have to deal with day-to-day chit. See what I am saying here?
Then ask her how you can support her? Be careful not to say "what" you can do to support her which suggests that W can't do anything herself and she'll react quite strongly to that implication. KWIM.
