Am I sweating the small stuff and not seeing the overall picture?
I think so. Most LBH's swing into "homebody" mode when the WAW BD's them. They cook, clean, do laundry, clean the drive, etc. There's nothing wrong with that, but it doesn't gain any points with the WAS for 3 reasons:
1) They always view stuff like this as "too little, too late".
2) It is all beta behavior which is not what attracts women to men. Alpha behavior is where the attraction is. Alpha is strength, independence, strong self-esteem. Alpha is where initial attraction comes from, then beta provides comfort. But after many years of marriage a lot of men lose all their alpha and have way too much beta. After BD we tend to do the opposite of what we should do- we become needy, emotional wrecks and we INCREASE our beta behavior instead of working on our alpha.
3) By increasing our beta behavior we inadvertently take over many of the WAS's responsibilities around the house which makes them feel they are no longer needed. They feel like we're pushing them out the door even though we think we're helping them.
So, clean the driveway, just don't expect it to have any impact on your W. Do it because it's what YOU want to do. What's more important is what are YOU doing to get out, GAL and become the strong, independent, good-looking man she was attracted to to begin with?
