Here I Am Again!

[Missmygirl]

Planet,

You are right. That is the last thing she wants to hear. Actually, after I read what I posted above and started looking at myself like I was a nagging woman, I heard myself saying, "Just shut up! She doesn't want to hear any of your nagging and it's just driving her farther away."

BTW, I don't think she's still communicating with this OM. I made it very clear in October that I would not tolerate her having ANY contact with him. The last time I know that she spoke with him was back in September. She knows that this is off limits.

With E, I think this is more of a power struggle. Almost like a stand to assert her individuality and independence. She has always been hyper sensitive to people placing demands on her. She can come across as quite headstrong, spirited, rebellious if you will. Even if you're trying to help her solve a problem, if you tell her what to do, that's her cue to do the opposite.

Maybe I've smothered her. Maybe I've placed too many demands on her. Maybe this is her way of acting out. She's hell bent on showing me that she can't be and won't be controlled. Much like a wild horse, she's so crazy about getting "free" of anyone who tries to harness her that she will hurt anyone and everyone who gets in her way. Even herself.

When I met her, I was attracted to her independent spirit, her confidence and her drive. Not sure why I expected her to settle down. She was quiet for a while. Within these past couple of years, she's just "exploded".

I am now commencing a new 180. Instead of "Just Do It", mine is going to be called "Just Quit". That means I give up on us and quit trying to make it work. If she finally decides she wants a relationship with me, she'll have to prove it thru action, cause I'm done trying. I'm now taking care of me and my two daughters.

If you guys hear me telling stories of confronting her about partying, trying to get her to tell me her feelings, me telling her how I feel, or any other crap like that, skip the 2x4 and go straight to the Louisville Slugger.

2x, thanks for the support. I just started reading about what you're dealing with. I hope things are well with you. Hang in there!