I have only been home for a few hours and I already wish that I did not have to leave my little vacation away from reality. I had an amazing time and was truly happy for four days. Of course I missed my kiddos like crazy, but I felt better about myself than I have in YEARS. I want to go back right now. I know that i can't escape reality and need to go through this pain and hard work.
In addition to some innocent flirting, I had another first on my trip. I recently removed by wedding ring. My coworker totally called me out on it one night. Iexpected someone to ask so I was prepared. For the first time ever, I said out loud "my H and I are separated.". When I told my best friends, I told them via email because I knew that I would not be able to get the words out. So I just took a deep breathe and said it. Of course everyone overheard our conversation and the news spread. Even though it was hard, it felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. No more living a lie everyday. Plus I wanted people to know so that if I flirted a bit they did not think it was weird. Another steps towards detachment. Another step towards my new life whatever it may hold.
