Been there Paul. It look four months for my H to look at/smile at me. If I even moved too quickly in his general vicinity he would jump like he thought I was going to punch him. It was ridiculous. If they were nice to you and dropped their image of you being the villain then they would not be able to justify leaving their family. Keep the smile on your face and waive anyway because that is who you are. Dont let you W change that.
