Wadad, reading your sitch gave me an incredible sense of deja' vu, it's very similar to my own (with the only big difference being I wasn't a SAHD). Right down to the PPD and W taking Zoloft for it. I too was told by W that I "yelled" at the kids too much, but before BD she often complimented me on how good I was at maintaining discipline with the kids and how jealous she was that they listen to me and respect me but not her. Such is what happens when they pull the trigger, things before BD that may have been positives are suddenly used against you. That said, I'm sure there were things you did wrong in the M, who is perfect? So use this opportunity to have a good, hard look at yourself and make the changes you need to make to make yourself into the "spouse only a fool would leave". But just prepare yourself, this is a marathon, not a sprint. Read my signature to get an idea of how long I've been at this.
Regarding the D papers, it would have been better to not say anything to her. It is very common for WAS's to get the papers together and then get cold feet about it. They are confused and in turmoil, it may not seem like it on the outside but they are. They are constantly battling with themselves over what they're doing. When you ask about the D, it just puts pressure on them and makes it more likely that they'll push forward with it. So don't ever mention it. Read Sandi2's 37 Rules and live them! Good luck!
