W came by last night to drop off a tuition check for D19. She had her temporary sleeve on and wow, it's huge. It looked like some kind of lining (cotton maybe) wrapped tightly with that putty-colored bandage material. It extended from high on her shoulder all the way down to her fingers and was even wrapped around each finger. I was so stunned looking at it that I didn't even know what to say. I managed to eke out a couple of questions about if it hurts (a little) and if it inhibits her mobility (yes, can barely bend at the elbow or use her fingers), how long she has to wear it (3 weeks) and if it ever comes off (only during physical therapy). She didn't stay long and after she left I felt bad for not offering any emotional support for what has got to be a major change for her. This morning I sent her this email:
"Thanks for the check, I'll deposit it at lunch and I should be able to pay the tuition by this afternoon.
I'm so sorry that you have to wear that compression sleeve, it really breaks my heart that you've had to go through so much with the cancer. (D17) said that the sleeve makes you feel ugly, but your beauty has always come from within and isn't just about looks so I hope the sleeve doesn't make you feel down for long. I'm sure your mobility will be better once they remove the temporary wrap you have on now, but let me know if there's anything you need help with while you're having to wear the temporary one. I'm sure it makes even simple tasks more complicated, so I'll be happy to help if you need anything."
I doubt it'll get a response and I don't expect it, but I felt like I needed to say SOMETHING to her.
Originally Posted By: bustingout
I'm very sorry to hear about your wife, AS. And also sorry that your kindness and compassion was received with ice. It is uncanny how even 'normaL' offerings of kindness are taken so coldly by the WAS.
Keep being authentic AS- you are a good man
Thank you for stopping by Busting, and for the great encouragement
