WBW, Generally, I discourage asking for a heads up about what the meeting will be about. But, if you feel the need to ask, then I would phrase it as "h, about our meeting, is there anything I should have available for us to discuss?" Keep it simple.
Do not ask about the ow. This is the first question that needs to be struck from your list. The more you bring her to the table and ask about her, the more power you give her and he most likely will not tell you anything any way. Don't feed the ow's power keg. You'll have a better sense about the status from the conversation...but do not bring her up as a topic.
I would go ahead and prepare a visitation schedule just in case he's talking the divorce language. You can prepare yourself for the meeting...but it may not even be about the pushing for a divorce.
Stay positive. Many have "assumed" what the meetings will be about and have worked themselves up to anxiety and panic and then discover the meeting isn't about what they "assumed". Meet w/him w/a positive attitude, listen to what he has to say and wait until he's finished talking before stating your views. Ask questions about finances, children, support, etc....but not about the ow. Keep this on a business level type of meeting.
You can do this, I know you can. Stay positive!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
