Four weeks in, hopeful but just starting!

[KGirl]

Today has been a tough day for me, probably because it's a day off of work and I don't have enough things to do besides think about the crappy state of things... and it's snowing so hard to go anywhere. Guess it's better to journal it out here than to cry and yell at H when he gets home.

I'm really struggling with this limbo state. Half the time I'm thinking "There's every reason to be positive! He hasn't taken any actual action yet, or moved out, and keeps coming home every night... there must be some doubt in his mind. I just need to be the best person I can be and stay positive." But then the other half of the time I'm angry at myself/him and thinking "Get real, K. He said it's over and has zero interest in working on things. Stop getting your hopes up and reading all these books and just start taking steps to move on with your life". I just got thrown into the latter state of mind when I logged into my online calendering and saw he was no longer sharing his calendar with me (which he never put anything in besides some work things that I probably shouldn't be seeing anyway, but still...)

How do I know when it's time to say enough is enough and actually move on with my life (move out, file for D myself, etc.)? Obviously there's no magic timeline or date and I'm only about a month into this, but did anyone else get to a point where they felt like they had left no stone unturned and needed to take action for themselves? What feelings/thoughts did you have that led you there?