I'm at that low point we all go through. It f*cking hurts!!!
I soooo know how this feels. I was feeling this way a couple weeks ago. It was the worst I have felt since BD. Here's what I did; maybe it will help you. Instead of trying to fight the bad feelings, I just let them come. I leaned into them. And I found that they were not bottomless, as I had thought they were. I also remembered that plowing through the hurt (rather than denying it) is healing. So I thought of it as a good thing that would help me grow and propel me forward at some point.
After a day long pity party, I remembered that I get to decide whether I am going to be a victim, and I get to choose whether to be happy. So I wrote a list of things I was grateful for. And I won't lie. The things were like, "being alive (grumble grumble)." and "cheese." But, then I reached out to some friends, I went to yoga (I love the mental aspect of yoga), and I added some more things to my list. (My friends and yoga, for starters.) And soon enough, I realized I didn't feel so bad anymore, and then I realized that wow, I am really resilient! I no longer need to wallow in my pain and self pity. I can feel the feelings and let them go.
Remember that you are still you, and you are still worthy, regardless of what your W does. Her decision to date someone else does not reflect poorly on you, 2TH.
Hang in there . . . it will get better. Focus on you, not on your W.
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
