Heather, you have had a lot of stuff to deal with in the last few days. Tough stuff, I know. And you did great.
Just a couple of things, if I may.
You have to be very careful with what you say about their dad in front of them. He is still their dad, and your goal, as their mom, needs to be to cause no harm to that relationship. What he does or doesnt do to foster it, is on him.
Your children are always watching. And I know you know, they see and hear far more than what we think they do.
You have the honor to show them how to navigate through life's tough stuff. Do it well.
I know it was tough to do all that you had to in order to get your daughter back to college. And as Bea said, how lucky for you to have a mom to support you. How wonderful that you all got to do that together.
You should make it a fun thing next time. Fill it with songs and games and silliness.
Smokey's loss for his choices.
I think you should tell your daughters that if they dont want their dad to visit again, they should let him know. Acting the way they did was not the right thing, regardless of what he has done.
It is not your job, however, to facilitate their relationship with him. That is theirs to forge.
If he comes again, I would like you to have a different mindset then the one you had.
Originally Posted By: loisb
I handled myself like a woman who has been treated very badly by someone and needed to keep her guard up.
I would like to see you act like a woman who is strong and confident, who knows who she is and who is doing great, DESPITE how he treated you, ya know?
