Friday night I went out with my girlf friends. When he got home from the gym, and I was getting ready to leave I had to deal with a lot of "sad puppy" looks from him. I don't think I he realized he was doing it... But it was kind of funny considering he leaves me at home to go out with his friends pretty regularly. He was noticing that I was dressed up, and complaining that he had to feed the kids dinner. Super ridiculous.
Then, near the end of the night out I started getting texts from him "Everything ok." Which I didn't respond to right away. When we got home, I chatted with him for a few mins but then went in my room to get ready for bed. He also came in and did the same and then got in our bed. Didn't go to the den. We laid there together for a bit and he eventually said "I kinda missed you tonight." I told him that was good, that I like to hear that. We had a very nice, passionate (which even though we have continued to ML and it's very good, it's lacked emotional passion... But we had that Friday. It was beautiful. He slept in our room.
Then Saturday, I was up and out much of the day with one of our kids. When I came home he was at the gym, and then we got home from that, I went to the gym. One of our kids slept over at a friends house and one of our kids had a friend over - so they were out of our hair. He and I watched a movie, and he had a bunch to drink. It wasn't sloppy, he was a lot of fun. Very silly. We ML that night too and he slept in the room.
When we woke up, he was in a good mood but shortly after said "I hate that bed!" (News to me) and continued with "it always hurts my back! I need to go back to the futon." I just looked at him and said "ok" kind of matter of factly. And then he said "I knew you'd get upset and expect that I would always sleep with you now." I said I wasn't upset. I asked him if he only wanted to sleep on the futon in the den because of his back. He said "no, I just want to, and I was going to last night but I forgot." I said ok. And basically dropped it. Told him I wasn't upset. He really wasn't being argumentative or angry - just kind of saying... And I could tell he was expecting me to be upset but I controlled myself, unlike my reactions in the past.
I guess it really doesn't matted to me where he sleeps as long as we are connecting in other ways. And this weekend we did. I'd love to status check with him in more detail - but I know it could screw up the good progress that was made. He did say last night "this is a great weekend" so I guess I just leave it at that and be happy for the great weekend.
Thoughts?
Me, 39. H, 35. 3 boys - 13, 11, 9 - 1 w/ multiple disabilities BD Dec 2012 Sort of a quasi in-house sep Nov 2013
