separated 6 weeks still on the journey

[paul19510]

journaling: Evening out went well. I had hoped the situation would not come up. She asked about it. A convo happened. She's been cheated on divorced and single now for 8 years. She had a lot of (without knowing) db information or advice. I told her I'd like to get together again next month, but not discuss the situation. Interesting take she had on the weekly status emails I send my W. she asked, "its been 6 weeks and she's not answering any of them..?" So, friend recommended sending one more this week on time as usual. Stating factually, the information in the weekly schedule is unchanged over the past several weeks an that I will only send W an email in future should something change with the normal schedule. She can feel free to contact with any questions. And then stop. I agree with her that in my W's case, she'd seeing these weekly emails as pursuit (however light) and that its lengthening the current limbo.

observations: I noted that my W has not even logged into the checking account to note the balance or do any transactions. W has just "unplugged' and is living at parents place and just doing her horse stuff and seeing kids when she wants. its a fantasy life where W need not be a W or a parent unless she desires to. her basic needs are met(food shelter and basic finances), and she no longer has to speak with me about anything unless its important to kids or the "business" part of our M.

In order to make progress something must change. contact should be first. I believe that my W is currently viewing almost ANY contact as pursuit (even though its light pursuit).

Off to game number 3 for the weekend. I'll check in later. Have a great day!