I'm not sure if no movement is good, it depends on the reason for the no movement. I think she's under the impression all the paperwork is with me. In which case, I would be seen as the delayer. It is still what I want, but nothing W has done or said lately has indicated reconciliation is even on the table at all. I'm trying to have no expectations and still continue to GAL and enjoy my own life.
Well as I've posted to you before, I'm in a similar sitch. W has said several times that the paperwork would be forthcoming, and yet to date I still have nothing. What you want is what I want- just to know SOMETHING. Is she on the fence about it and having second thoughts? Or is she just too busy to deal with it? Or does she just not realize that the ball is still in her court? Here's the thing, if your W was really in a hurry then she would call her L and confirm that the paperwork has been sent. She would be calling her L to see if you had sent the paperwork back. Or maybe calling you. Regardless, silence from her end means that she is not pushing right now. I have chosen to just STFU and be patient. It's OK for me, because I am able to do it with ZERO expectations that it means anything. I guess that's what I advise you, if you can be patient and have no expectations then leave it be. She can hardly blame you for delaying when you never even received anything. But if it's keeping you up nights and eating at you, then go ahead and tell her you haven't received it and ask her what's up.
Thanks for your reply AnotherStander, I appreciate your insight as always! I'm trying not to overthink things and mindread, it's just what you mentioned, I want to know SOMETHING.
I just have had no indication of a change of heart from her, and we have had no positive interactions so I can't imagine a miraculous 180 at this point in her mindset.
H: 29 WAXW: 30
Bomb Drop- 9/9/13 Negotiated Settlement- 5/9/14 D Final- 5/21/14 XW has breakdown in attorney lobby- 5/30/14
Thanks for stopping by all, I'm looking forward to my GAL activities this weekend.
I'm going for yogurt this evening with a new young lady I met online, she knows the whole situation and oddly enough is the most interested.
Tomorrow I work for 8 hours, then I'm going straight to church, and then I'm planning to either go to an ice hockey game, or bowling.
On Sunday, I'm going to a meetup hike in the morning with 30+ people, sadly the dog can't come to this one. I'm supposed to meet another young lady from online at that meetup hike as well. On Sunday night I may be getting basketball game tickets so potentially going to a pro game that night. Hopefully should be a good weekend!
H: 29 WAXW: 30
Bomb Drop- 9/9/13 Negotiated Settlement- 5/9/14 D Final- 5/21/14 XW has breakdown in attorney lobby- 5/30/14
Thanks for checking in on my thread K. Sounds like you're on a roll with meeting new people and GAL. I hope you enjoy your weekend!
me: 30 H:30 tgthr:7 m:4 no kids 5 counseling sessions initiated by H as a LR: Oct 2012 long distance marriage b/c of work since Nov 2012 official BD: July 2013 nothing filed 1/1/14 I dropped the rope
Had another interesting encounter at church this evening. As a reminder, I expressed to W that I regularly attend the Saturday night service, so that her parents would feel comfortable going on their normal Sunday time. I really debated today after working 8 hours whether I should go or just watch online from home. I really felt some force telling me to go in person so I did.
I got there pretty early and went to the restroom before the service started. As I went to walk into the worship center, I ran into my mother in law in the hallway. I'm pretty sure she was surprised to see me, but I just smiled warmly at her and said hello and asked her how she was doing. She actually smiled back and said she was well and I just kept walking.
I decided to sit up front so there was no chance of trying to glance over and find them and see who else might be with mother in law at the service. I discreetly ducked out before the service officially ended to avoid any awkward situations afterward.
I guess as far as encounters go, I would classify it as a positive one.
H: 29 WAXW: 30
Bomb Drop- 9/9/13 Negotiated Settlement- 5/9/14 D Final- 5/21/14 XW has breakdown in attorney lobby- 5/30/14
Well, it was a great weekend and I survived a MIL encounter at church. I went on a 7 mile hike this morning with 30+ meetup hikers, and the organizer asked me if I wanted to start organizing some of the Sunday meetup hikes for him. I get along great with everyone so I am really considering it.
I'm anticipating hearing something from W in the next few days regarding what's going on with the divorce. Tomorrow will be a month since she supposedly sent over the final decree paperwork. That milestone seems to me like time for a followup, so prepping myself mentally/emotionally for getting that contact.
H: 29 WAXW: 30
Bomb Drop- 9/9/13 Negotiated Settlement- 5/9/14 D Final- 5/21/14 XW has breakdown in attorney lobby- 5/30/14
