separated 6 weeks still on the journey

[paul19510]

Thanks! I just want to feel worth something again. This M left a mark on me. I am cleaning up my side of it and owning things. Even though I asked her to join me in getting help and making this a love to be envied, she declined so far. When I spoke with a friend about this, they eluded to a sense that they had that W felt she could just plug herself back in anytime she wished. As of today I don't agree with that. She has to fight for me too and earn a good M too. I need tonstep back and see if she will. In the meantime, I will continue to visit. With friends and family and make new friends and see where my journey takesnme. If I feel I can no longer hang around and be alone I will evaluate my desire for companionship and act accordingly. I will not break my vows. I'm just not built like that. So, I guess I will cross that bridge another day. I believe rust there are people out there that would have been glad to offer me TLC and a warm meal as I requested above. Why did I settle for what I did? I am worth it. Ideserve to be treated well. If she asks to try that has to be something to consider. Of course I'm dreaming. She already three me away. Right?