Labug - Thank you so much for your response. You are right. The OW feeds my H's ego and makes him feel amazing. Of course, they were living in a little fantasy world. My H accused me of not supporting him because I asked for help around the house and for his attention for myself and the kids. I called him out when he got a DUI and when he started going out all night long and never coming home. Since OW also got a DUI, there is no shame in talking to her about it. I will just keep repeating to myself "This is not about you 3. It has nothing to do with you as a person. This is about your H."
I have not gone to AlAnon. This is actually the first time someone has mentioned that I may want to look into it. I guess that I never viewed by H as a alcoholic because he does not drink all the time and I guess does not fit my image of an alcoholic. H's problem is that when he decides to go out and "drink" he is unable to control himself. I guess that would count as a drinking problem. H's dad drinks a lot, so I have always been concerned about H. I will definitely look into some local meetings.
