The actual divorce is the big thing for me & feel desperately like I need to prevent it.
I know it's just a piece of paper really but it also makes me feel that our wedding & honeymoon were then just completely pointless, all of the money that was spent on it was in vain & the whole memory of our wedding would be tainted & no longer be a good memory.
I totally get it, because I have had similar thoughts. I look at the gorgeous wedding photo of us so happy, hanging in my bedroom and think, "what a F-ing joke," for example. I am embarrassed in front of my friends and family who came to our wedding, gave us gifts, all that. Yes, it totally s.u.c.k.s.
Dig a little deeper and see where that is coming from. Yes, you are hurt. Totally understandable. But your memories are your memories. The good times you had with your W can't be undone. The future you had with her may be gone, but she can't take away the past you have together. You still had those great moments, the love, the honeymoon, the fun times together. . . why are those tainted now?
(Can you tell I am lecturing myself too?)
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
