Intimacy. Sex. The World's Most Powerful Potion. Hmmmm....not easy subjects to tackle at all.
Maybe your W has some fears too on this subject. Ask her to put her armor on first before broaching the subject and I'd tell her about your fears about the "movie" with the XOW. I'm wondering if you feel secure and safe enough at this stage to take the first vulnerable step toward intimacy by talking about your fears? How would that aid in the reconnection process?
Being physically intimate through ML requires a certain level of trust for the pair of you. It seems to me that neither pair of you are ready for this phase. Change requires complete honesty which leads to greater cleaning and greater integrity.
This requires you to explore unexplored emotions and expressing unexpressed opinions. Scary, indeed! However, someone's got to take the first step. Most certainly will trigger some intense emotions for both of you.
For me, I do try very, VERY hard to squat the "movie" with Ms. Wonka and the OW out of my head. I think all of this to comes to our feelings of inadequacy in the performance department. Wasn't I good enough of lover to you? Wasn't I sexually liberating enough for you? On and on. You get the picture. I'm wondering if you are having these thoughts of inadequacy as well.
