Lol I sure don't deserve a halo. It took a few calls for me to figure that something was wrong to lose these sites within the client footprint. These were clients since 1995, and I was desperately afraid they went to a competitor. But I didn't know for sure. And the more I thought about it (remember that I have anxiety issues), the more uneasy I became.
I didn't get coached. I was just uncomfortable enough to get off my ass and do something. You know? The way I figured, I just lost $50k in a maintenance contract and referrals, so what did I have to lose by asking them why they made their decision?
I asked all 3 manager/directors, and I heard back from all 3 very quickly. But like I said, I was determined to listen no matter how unpleasant it might be. At least I got great reviews....
When I hung up, I thought, "well, [censored]. Now what? How am I going to come up with more clients quickly to make up for that lost revenue?" For some reason, I didn't enter the anxiety zone. I kind of went calm and said to myself, " well, nature abhors a vacuum, so something else will come along." I sell capital equipment in call centers, and the sales cycle is typically 12-18 months because getting the money requires putting it in the budget, justifying the purchase and then waiting for approval. Sometimes, the pipeline completely gets washed up, and sometimes I'm lucky to hit it at the right time. That's the exception rather than the rule, though.
It wasn't 2 days later when I got a call from VZ. It was for one site in Pittsburgh only, but a healthy sale nonetheless. It got approved in less than 24 hours! A couple weeks later, I got word that there are 3. I'm making up that $50k and doubling it. Then we have the opportunity for other cities after these projects are complete.
So I kinda feel the reward was in the willingness to move past the fear and learn?
Come whine with me. I can handle it, and I'll coach you if you need it.
Discomfort is a powerful motivator? Clearly losing income had a lot to do with it... Plus the thought of them going to a competitor made me ill. I just had to know why, if it was the case.
Don't be hard on yourself. A couple of years ago, I would have pretended it didn't matter and stuck my head in the sand. I think after a miserable couple years in business just made me sick of losing more than I already had...
Good luck!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I think it's going to be a real challenge for me to look at my competitor, who beat me out for 100% of my income, day in and day out for an entire week, through what is already a challenging situation...answering stupid questions, watching them watching what we do, and wanting to vomit on them. OK that was immature. I think the only way to see that as a positive is to learn everything I can from it, and ask them questions about what they do. I would really rather not, but I don't have any choice. I won't lose my cool, but like I told my IC, it will take a toll on me and I'll need an outlet to keep my head on straight. You never really know where things are going to lead.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
I've thought a bit about your work thing. I wonder what lies behind your agreement to allow your competitor to shadow you? It is not clear to me that it is a reasonable or ethical request for your client to make as it seems to require you to share your work product with your replacement.
Unless your contract requires you to train your replacement or gives your client ownership over what I would have thought to be your own work product, I don't see how you would be morally or professionally obligated to share with the replacements.
I guess the client can have your competition attend the event. But that seems far different than requiring you to allow them to follow you around.
I've no idea what led to your decision to accept your client's request. Have you given any thought as to what boundaries will work for you to protect yourself professionally and emotionally? What are your boundaries? How will you share them? How will you respect them?
I would think it to be reasonable and professional to say: "I appreciate that you respect the value of my work and would like to carry through some aspects of my work as you switch to the competition. We will need to find a different way for that to happen. I find that it is inconsistent with my professional ethics and interests to have people from the competition shadow me or for me to try to train them at the same time I carry out the services for which we have a contract. Any such activity would interfere with my ability to provide excellent service and require me to share my work product with the competition. Of course, the competition is welcome to attend the event as guests, but it would be unprofessional for me to interact with them other than as guests during the event. I would be open to working with the competition on a fixed contract to help with the transition. We could negotiate the details of such an arrangement after the event if that is of interest."
Maybe you are so used to swallowing bitter pills that you've forgotten to ask yourself whether to take it to begin to avoid the nasty taste and stomach upset altogether....
OT sure as heck raised some points that I completely missed yesterday. I was drinking scotch while writing to you???
Do you even know why they terminated your services and decided to go with another firm? Is this why you were asking me that question? Because you're afraid to find out?
I think that might be the best first step to making you better about the situation. Knowledge is power, and you can't change something if you don't know there is an issue.
If you haven't done that, this is how I would coach you to do it:
"In order for me to grow and become more successful in my career, I'd like you to be completely honest with me as to why you terminated my services and went with a competitor. I haven't been quite clear on the reason and would very much like to know."
Then zip the lip and listen.
THEN, depending on whether or not you feel their explanation credible and acceptable,
"I'm really uncomfortable training my replacement, as it is a competitor. I'm not an employee training my replacement, but an independent contractor. My methods and work ethic are my own trademark, and I don't feel like this is something I can do with a clear conscience."
Uh, now that I think about it, I had to do this with my moonlighting job at the volleyball club last year. I was their bookkeeper for 7 years. One of the new BOD members decided that one of the coaches could do my job. He asked me to devote 3 months to training that person (who I very much like and who remains a friend to this day). I told him, "No, thank you. I'm a trained bookkeeper and he's a civil engineer. I can't train him to do my job in 3 months any more than he can train me how to be a civil engineer in 3 months." He accepted my request and we terminated then.
And I felt good about not being the nice guy at my expense.
You seem like a person who is itching to grow and learn. It often requires moving out of your comfort zone and to say no when it isn't good for you. IMHO, this is exactly one of those circumstances.
Thanks to OT for ringing that bell...
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
That gives me a lot to consider. I appreciate being able to tap your experience and insight.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
