You know, PM, I think I understand why your wife feels. It isnt really that she is scared of you.
There is something about a person with a lot of comfidence to a person who doesnt have much. I know because I didnt used to have much.
She is struggling, it seems, to find her way, to understand what it means to be on her own, to find her.
You are someone who handles things. I would imagine you swooped in at times. Now, there isnt anything in and of itself necessarily wrong with that. But to someone who is a little lost, who lacks some self confidence in certain areas, it can be a bit intimidating.
And I know several Marines, great guys, but there is a certain confidence about them, that is different from others.
I am a very capable woman. I am smart, resourceful, etc. But my xh had a way of making me feel a bit incapable. Because he would just do these little things, that I dont think he realized.
Sometimes it was just a look or a word, other times he swooped in. I was very capable at work, at everywhere else, actually. Yet, when I was around him, I just wasnt.
Your wife is trying really hard to get through this. She is trying really hard to find her center, to figure out just who she.
I know that you are not purposely, in any way, trying to make her feel that way. She is doing that. We allow others to make us feel a certain way.
It is important to let her lead. She clearly wants your approval. Be mindful of your words and actions. Show her that you think she is capable and worthy and that you respect her.
I am sure that you try to do this as much as possible. And you are who you are in terms of your personality. And I get the "isnt fun to disagree with you" aspect. So maybe you try not to be so quick to react and correct when around her, ya know?
