separated 6 weeks still on the journey

[melissag]

I flat out do not understand her decisions to remain separate and silent but I guess I don't have to. I didn't make those decisions she did.

3 told me to not expect anything. I understand it intellectually. In my mind's eye I know that I saw this playing out very differently. That we would live apart but continue to talk and work. That she would reach out but she hasn't really done so. As I write this and the days wear on I guess its just sinking in that I was wrong. I feel disappointed and hurt.

Paul, I am right there with you. I think it's fairly typical, though. When the WAS moves out, the LBS turns his focus to the M and wants to fix things, while the WAS finally feels free and starts to settle in to enjoy her new life. I don't think that means it will last forever. I just think it's more proof that the vets are right when they say over and over, that this takes a LOT of time and a LOT of patience.

thanks Rick! I will do that. having a lot of trouble feeling positive today. Again nt sure why the change in the past 2 days. but it is what it is. I went to class this morning and sweated it out for a while. At least my body is getting "ripped" by all this working out LOL

I think we all go in cycles, Paul. I know for me, I will have a few good days, and then maybe something will happen to drop me back to earth, or maybe it's just that when I start to feel better, I feel like my M should be better too. But it's not. And that's depressing.

I have many good friends the reaffirm me. Why am I so hell bent on discussing things or focusing on this one person who does not seem to value me???

I agree with Rick . . . it's totally normal for this to be such an enormous loss. I have friends, too. They are amazing. But my H was the one I shared my life with for many years. Same for you. Honestly, I don't understand how the WASs seem to have such an easy time with this. But, who knows WTF they are thinking.

Good for you for working out - it has definitely saved me in many ways.

Hope today is a better one for you. Hang in there.