Hi Lady I haven't posted for a while or even read..I was finding the pain everyone was going through too close to home and I could only add me too. I started reading your thread from the beginning knowing it had a happy ending was a comfort. I have been in this sitch for 4 months. We still have contact. He still has an OW. However I don't believe or feel it is over. He is depressed and not consistent with his actions or words. I am better at being ok alone but I think the hope that things will improve keeps me optimistic. I look at the advice of how would you live if it was truly over and I know my answer would not result in any reconciliation because I would be on the other side of the world, so that advice makes me feel like a failure. You sound like me with the lists of things to do around the house and the need to control how the world works, how people should feel, act, think. Was it pure mental strength to control those urgesto control? Could the control instinct been part of the ability to not give up?
Like you my work emphasises being in control. It is a hard line to walk. Exactly how did you do that.?
Have you noticed how many women are accused of controlling, pressure. ? Seems like almost a gender specific issue.
From my reading seems like you were in this sitch for more than 6 months efore you really came to terms with it then then there were still dark days a long time later. Somehow that makes me feel like the advice to divorce now is premature..or am I controlling, using my persistence to get what I want. Hope I am not hijacking your thread.I value your thoughts.
