Not to pile on, but yeah....what they (^^^^) said. There is a pretty strong possibility that you are about to walked squarely on top of a land mine and we are really trying to get you to head the other way while you can.
SM - you have GOT to lose the professorial tone with your W. There is NOTHING that you can teach her. Let me say that again: there is NOTHING that you can teach her. I have been stressing this for my last few posts - you both need to get help from a professional. There is no way in hell that you are going to be that professional for your wife.
It seems very much like now that you are back in a place where you have a glimmer of hope you are reverting back to some of the same crap that got you her in the first place. If your wife was saying she felt "lesser than" relative to you in the marriage - why would you try to "lead" her in anything relative to her and the affair?
Listen, we are all human here - and we all have been through some rough times emotionally with our spouses. There is a certain sense of gratification that we get when we see our situations turning to our favor - but you would be wise to ignore it. IF your wife is coming back to you - be humble, be her parther, her EQUAL. Jointly own your problems and work as a TEAM to find ways to repair them. I could say more but I am sure you get the point......do you??
