I completely agree with what everyone else is saying... But I think it's a process and you just aren't at peace yet. Perhaps you will get there, perhaps it will take awhile... I can sense that you feel like getting the papers was just too early. I'm so sorry. I too feel like I would fight it at this moment - but like everyone is saying, I am not sure what anyone would gain by that nor, do I think it would wake my H up to want to stay with me...
I like what you are saying about living in the present moment. I am working on that as well and I want to recommend a book to you that has been blowing me away... Along with DR, it's been super instrumental in helping me work on myself, "Emotional Chaos To Clarity" by Phillip Moffitt. You can also check out dharmawisdom.org for similar readings on many relevant topics discussed here.
It's not necessarily that I am not at peace but it's that I am not willing to admit to something I haven't done, especially when that could have negative consequences regarding me keeping the house etc. It's also not about getting her to stay with me, It's doing what I will be happy with long term and will not regret.
Thanks for the recommendations.
Me: 34, Wife: 34 Son: 2 Married: 8, Together: 14 Wife moved out 8/25/2013 Divorce papers received 01/10/2014
