Blues - If you ask him to leave, it is still going to hurt. H will continue to come/go as he pleases no matter where he lives. He will get the comforts of his new place. He will figure out a way to survive on the bear minimum (my H eats out ever meal and does laundry every couple of weeks). Forcing him to live alone is not going to change his mind overnight. If you understand all of this and you still want him gone, then you can ask him to leave. I feel like sometimes we get so impatient and just want something to change, to make your H see that he is wrong.
Just think about it for a bit. Do you really want him to no longer live in your house? If not, then I would try and figure out a way to avoid contact or get your own space. Maybe that means taking a class or exercising. You have kids, so you will still have to interact. H and I talk about daily. It is hard because there are days when he is cold and short tempered. I still have to deal with it to some extent because I cant get eliminate him from my life.
This all $ucks so much. There is not quick fix.
If you are not convinced you want him to leave, then what things can you do to help give you some time and space? Drive separately to events? Spare room for him to more into? Specific nights that your H watches the kids so you can get out? Make h do his own laundry/shopping?
