Newbies introduce yourself /moderation notes

[CaliDreaming]

I’m a longtime lurker, but first time poster. I am in need of some advice. I’ve been married 14 years and have three daughters (12,11,9). In September 2012, I had the bomb dropped on me that the marriage was dead and what was the point continuing on. She is a classic WAW who was not getting her emotional needs met. I will post more details on our background separately, but in short, I was crushed. Luckily, I discovered Divorce Busting and this forum. I’ve made great strides personally and feel like I’ve stopped the bleeding in our relationship. We continue to live in the same house and sleep in the same bed. We get along great as parents and friends, but all forms of affection have ceased.

I feel like my wife is very confused about what she wants, which is to be expected. I think she loves me as a person and a father. She doesn’t want to hurt the family, but she’s not feeling romantic feelings for me. What advice can anyone give me to help bridge that gap in our relationship?

I'm struggling with small things like touching her back because I don't want it to come off as pursuing. However, one of my major mistakes in our relationship was not showing her enough affection. It's just tough to determine the next steps...