It's confusing because the expression "letting go" is technically a verb but I found it to be more of a state.
It's one of those things that comes after you minimize him from your day to day life. I started by changing the little things that were a certain way because we lived together. It's hard and you'll never notice you started until later on.
Eventually I laid down on the couch and started tearing up. No sobbing, just tears and I just accepted...she's gone, she's where she wants to be, I can do nothing about it. It was a big "aha" moment that came on it's own...not a verb where I chose to do it, it just came.
Without that, I could have never handled things the way I have recently.
If you're looking to "let go", don't. That'll come in it's own time. Instead concentrate on minimizing him from your decisions, make new memories without him, do activities that are just yours, make friends who never even met him. That's about as much control as you'll have in all this.
Resentment occurs when we aren't doing what we need to care for ourselves, though we expect others to do it for us.
