wife moved to.parents house last week scared

[paul19510]

I had a backslide this morning and need to forgive myself but its hard. My W reached out to tell me our D13 was not going to school due to being sick today. I called her back and I discussed that the sitch was wearing on D13. I discussed that the quiet had been immensely helpful in my growth and that I continue to work very hard to become a better Paul, a better H and a great dad.

I told my W that I choose her. I responded to yesterday's comment that "I should walk a mile in her shoes" and said I'd be glad to. I fact I told her, I would carry her if she were sick or hurt and needed me.

For her part she says she feels a sense of peace and is smiling and laughing again for the first time in a long time. I told her the same for me. W shared that she still feels "triggers" or buttons in some of our exchanges. I agreed. I told her, these things can be worked through.

W said a month is so short a time and that she knew people that were separate for years. I said the same. I told her I will continue to move forward and was not certain I would wish to be separate for years but that there was nothing in any way immediate about the situation.

W said if she chooses me and comes home again some day she wants it to be forever and that's what she's wrestling with. W:

"...If I were to come home, I do not want to ever leave you again. I need to know that I can do that and not leave you. That is what I am thinking about now..."

I know this is a backslide. Although, I did get some useful information about how she sees life right now.

I am trying. I have a coaching call with Jody tonight and will discuss next steps.