Yes, it really needs to be done slowly. She needs to want to be back and feel whole, I need to fix my issues as well.

The main reason I'm cautious is that I've spoken to people in her situation. Some of them admitted to me that they're acting nice and have every intention of leaving as soon as the kids grow up. One even told me she's taking the extra step, has a couple FWB on the side waiting for her chance to leave.

I'd rather she didn't come back if it was to be like this. I'd rather start over and find a person who wants to be a part of my life than stick with her just for the sake of clinging to a marriage as long as possible.

Resentment occurs when we aren't doing what we need to care for ourselves, though we expect others to do it for us.