Living with the unknown - and being aware I am living with the unknow. That is a good description. Because until BD, I really had no idea I was living with any instability. Up until the time that I KNEW (evidence and all) that Skippy had been involved with someone else and was lying to me, I would have sworn that there was no way on earth he would do that to me.
Makes me wonder if we can truly know anyone.
MizJ, you mentioned that your H was trying on your thread. I don't know that Skippy is trying but he sure has shown up in little ways more frequently. I got a Christmas card (nothing special, came out of a box with a couple of scratch tickets) which said he thinks of me all the time; I got a text at midnight on Christmas Eve/Day, a text on New Year's Day and another text about the weather yesterday. I responded but no response after that.
Apparently, I am in a touch and go phase.
I am trying just to go with the flow right now. Which is hard for me.
For the most part though, I am keeping very busy and am not focussed on him. I do have bad days sometimes, slightly down days but they are more "discontent days" than the stay in bed and never want to come out days of the past.
The funny thing is that I still believe in that wierd connection between us. I don't profess to have any mystical powers but I do seem to have a knack of thinking of someone and making up my mind to contact them only to have them contact me. That is what happened yesterday. I found Skippy on my mind two days ago. I was curious to know when or if I would hear from him again. I guessed probably February. Yesterday morning, he texted. Random, casual and meaningless but still.
Nice thing is that I do not need to make any decisions.
