I said that I knew it would be a work in progress and that it would be like we would need to start dating again and I wouldn't want or expect him to move right in.
Your H is firmly ensconced with OW right now. This isn't the time to try and negotiate the terms of getting back together, it's not even on his radar.
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I told him I'm not ready to give up on us and that I didn't believe he was either.
He's pursuing a relationship with someone else. He'll string you along as his backup plan, but rest assured, he has no intentions of getting back together. As long as you keep telling him you're waiting for him, he'll be content to stay with OW and keep you in reserve in case that doesn't work out. Someone here recently said people appreciate what they have to work for and have no appreciation for what is given to them. That's part of why he has no appreciation for you, you're telling him you're waiting even though he's made no effort at your R at all. You've got to break this pattern, get out of the cheeseless tunnels like we talked about a few posts ago. QUIT telling him you're waiting. QUIT reaching out to him sharing your dreams and such. Make it clear to him that as long as he's with OW, you are done with him and moving on with YOUR life. Pick up new GAL activities. Get busy. Move on. I'm not telling you to quit standing, but I am telling you to quit focusing on him and start to focus on you. Sometimes I just wish that people in sitches like yours would get MAD about it, because when people get mad, they make changes. They do things differently. They quit being a doormat!
