And I just keep going...

[25yearsmlc]

Oh KG

Welcome back! And Happy New Year! Like NG said, it's great hearing how you incorporated your "marital" changes into all of you. Those are real changes! Yay YOU.

The swimming skill, yes it's huge. We bought a house with a pool and had our older kids take lessons and we were always with them. But with our youngest we had a pool and there was a school that specialized in teaching LITTLE kids to swim. Our d was then 3 (there were smaller kids there too, seriously. Like barely walking at all) and we had to hide out of sight and promise not to interfere. Scary, but it works. She is not afraid of water either.

And at the end, they tested the kids by a "surprise fall" into the water (as if someone had pushed them or they had stumbled) and the kids knew to first get to the surface, look for the nearest wall and paddle on over while keeping their heads up. It wasn't about teaching them to swim fast, or the backstroke, but how to float and swim and how to live. Absolutely a life skill. Good for you.

The private schools...I'm 6 of 9, and the first 4 went to private school up to high school and then switched over to the public high school, which had a good reputation and was a lot cheaper, obviously...The rest of us started ad finished in public schools in a good area.

Those who spent their first 8 years in private schools did, I have to say, WORSE than the rest of us. I think they had pent up "recreational" demands when they hit high school maybe or felt so far ahead they got bored??? But their grades were noticeably worse than the younger bunch.

My point is that I think a private school later on, matters more than the lower grades, in most places. BUT...

Let's not borrow problems from tomorrow. You will be an involved mother no matter where they go, for the first several years.

Later on, well, we will get to that, LATER on....

I love your simple achievable healthy goals. I'm a big one for having two bottles of water a day, (32 oz) and I do think it helps me stay healthy and not become a total slob. Also good for the skin!

When my leg heals all the way, I'll be exercising in more "wholistic" ways. So Next time we do a hike at the beach, it won't make us all breathe quite as hard!

KG, you are doing well. Truly.
You are such a strong example of "I am Woman, here me Roar!"

Though I do think Your h will see the tragedy of leaving a woman who no longer has the "issues" he felt were so important that he HAD to go...

I accept that we cannot know what that realization would look like or if it would create any change in his path. His pride, his other actions, might prevent any reversals...even if he does the thinking. You may not want who he might become, as a h either.

But my point is, unlike your h, I don't see you as having any regrets, from this day forward.

And KG, that "Regret Stopping", MATTERS!!

Your kids will know without a doubt that they are your great loves and priorities and that makes such a difference in our lives...knowing our mom's love us.

Abraham Lincoln said that despite deep poverty, and his mother's early death, he felt lucky having a mother and then a step mother who both loved him.

Growing up so poor, so scrappy just to survive, and then learning to read, etc...."ALL of whatever [he] became", he said he "owed to the two women who so made him feel loved."

You give that to your kids. And more.

((( )))