Wif wants Divorce, I do Not 2

[melissag]

BH, you are right . . . DB and GALing will help you. A lot. All of us here start with the goal of being back together. Some do get back together eventually. Some are in limbo for a long time. And some decide to move forward with D on their own, and feel good about their decision.

We always talk about how you should believe nothing a WAS says and only half of what they do. I think this is partly because they are a little crazy, but mostly because emotions change. So let's flip this around. Don't believe all the things you are feeling and thinking right now, either. Aren't you a little crazy now, too? And aren't your emotions changing all the time? You don't know what you will feel like next month or a year or two from now. Maybe you will still want to get back together, but maybe you won't. Maybe YOU will find something new, someone new. Or just a peaceful, fulfilling life on your own. Who knows what is around the next corner. I certainly didn't know that BD was around the corner, but it was.

I'm lecturing to myself too right now - but it's starting to sink in what others have said to me. Don't assume there is only one way to happiness in your future. Be open to other unknown outcomes and acknowledge that it's possible that you and your W will get D, will not R, and you will still be happy. I know that's really hard to accept right now (I am struggling with the same), but just remind yourself from time to time - trust that you won't be hurting forever and there is happiness in life for you regardless of what your W does.