wife moved to.parents house last week scared

[paul19510]

Journaling. HIIT class went very well at the Y today. sweated and worked the anxiety away. Still railing against this stuff today. My mind is spinning. I am trying to focus on work and the L meeting this morning.

I don't want this. I keep trying to understand why W walked away from a man and children who want to be a family. Why we could not just go out and enjoy each other more often like I asked and why she would not participate in family life unless it was regarding her equestrian stuff.

I guess I'll never really know. It doesn't have to make sense to me. It makes sense to W. I hope for Reconciliation, but have NO IDEA how that's even possible. I am barely in contact with W and actually right now, that feels better.

Class did feel good, but my stress level is high today. Not sure I understand that, but, I guess just put one foot in front of the other and keep moving. Perhaps this too shall pass.

3, you mentioned that this doesn't really affect W the same way it does me. We're all hurting. How could it be that she is not? How could someone make a life and then just throw it away??? mind still spinning. maybe the shower will help to quiet my mind. Unfortunately had to take one anxiety pill this morning. Was doing so good with it too

I understand that I have t be patient to see if things will work and continue to GAL. I did a good thing this morning regarding that. when I spoke with the teacher after class this morning, we chatted about me and my background because I am new. I told him I really enjoyed the class to help relieve stress. I deliberately decided NOT to tell him what the stress is from. previously I might have.

I cannot define myself by this or introduce myself and then mention that there's this thing in my life right now. its only one part of a whole big life and I have to remember that and not define myself as a man who is separated from his W. I am just Paul. A father, a son and a friend to people. nothing more needs to be said to people who don't know me and are becoming new friends to me. My journey continues.

Oh I almost forgot, when I met my W, I had recently broken off from a very passionate R with a girl who was separated and decided to stay in her marriage (I was very naïve then). I really loved her and was crushed when we split up. Anyway, I stopped all contact and GAL, met my W and continued on with my life. And, this person divorced and pursued me until there where no options.

so, looking at this, I understand, that GAL and moving forward and truly letting her go was what caused the possibility to even talk to her again and consider a R with her. Although it was not to be, I realize today that a similar path must be followed in order to maintain my dignity and to move forward with or without my W. am I getting this??