I'm not sure what that looks like. Proceeding with the divorce?
Or just going hard core no contact and giving him more time? And working on me during that time?
If there is any question in your mind about D (and it sounds like there is), then don't push for it. You will never lose when you work on you, so that is a definite "yes".
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And even if he does end it with OW I'm starting to have a lot of anxiety about recovering from the affair and saving the marriage. Can it really be done??
It can definitely be done, I've seen countless threads on this forum in which reconciliations happened after affairs. Is it easy? Not at all. LBS's spend so much energy trying to save the M that they never stop to think about what kind of spouse they're getting back. Then if the WAS does come back, they start to realize that they're not dealing with their old spouse anymore, they're dealing with a lying cheater. It's a long, hard road rebuilding respect after something like that.
