Moved Back from Overseas to Figure This Out...

[S4tk]

Just remember its all just an illusion, what she thinks is not what she knows. This guy is busy painting a pretty picture, she needs to see a pretty picture right now.

Let it play out, cause 90% of the time the fantasy comes crashing down. You cant have any part of it. She has to come to that realization on her own. That's why they call them fantasies, cause they never live up to the real thing.

So that nixes the idea of blowing up the secrecy and confronting. Most of the marriage experts I have read support the idea of confronting the WAS about an affair. Is MWD against this? DR doesn't explicitly address that, as far as I remember.

I hope you learned the two lessons here, 1. don't bring up ANY relationship talk, that just pushes her closer to him. 2. STOP snooping, cause the mind is a powerful tool to use against yourself.

I'm not sure how the R talk pushed her closer to or further from him. I think her limerence is pretty "full speed ahead" right now regardless.

And the snooping - I feel bad that I invaded her privacy. I am glad to know the truth. It has drawn me back into obsessing about what I want. But it seems to be helping me GAL and 180. So it is a mixed bag.

Detach, act "as if", get out and GAL, they're there for a reason. Time can be your friend if your putting in the work on YOU. Right now, are you the person only a fool would leave? then its time to get to work.

Well, I don't think any of us will ever ARRIVE at that "only a fool would leave" nirvana place, but I'm on the road!