New to the site...

[heartbroken5]

I did it again, I reached out and asked the ex if he would be be available to toast to the new year early, figuring that he had plans for the evening. He agreed. We met at a local wine bar and when he showed up, he was not the same guy that I met for lunch a few weeks ago. This time I was the one who was a little nevous and he was looking like he had something to prove. We managed to get through it all. We had great conversation once again and laughed so much. Then it happened... the topic of "what happened" came up. I was having such a great time, I said the past is the past, although I hate how things ended up, we can never go back there.. we can only move forward. He seemed relieved. I apologized for the part I played and he did the same. We talked about some of the realizations that we had... He told me about counseling and anger management that he'd taken. I told him that I loved him and would always love him... He said the same in return. I told him a lot of things that I'm not sure that I should have said, like against the rules. We talked about seeing one another again..and we kissed several times. I was thinking how did we get there, am I going to come crashing down soon and get sad again? What do I do now?