Wif wants Divorce, I do Not 2

[woundedfool]

This post prompted to respond, as I feel we were/are in similar situations.

First, your mind is going a mile a minute. Do your best to stop focusing on R. Yes, the thoughts spinning in your head, keeping you up all night, replaying your M in your mind, thoughts of the OM, etc. are TOUGH to deal with. But thats what you need to do is stop focusing on her, and your relationship with her..... Focus on YOU.

Cadet has a standard welcome post, and it is true... follow it to a "T". Detatch from her, learn patience, time is on your side, don't rush this or any upcoming decisions.

MIL does like me and said OM won't work. I don't get it.

My IN laws love me, think my ex is absolutely crazy for leaving. But it is not up to them or you. Let her experience the OM failure on her own.

Well W texted me. She feels stuck, broke, needs to get out of parents house. Parents are fighting. She wants to go back to school, get a job, rent a house with a friend.

Just listen and validate, she is seeing the parts that the grass is not really greener.

She said she never wanted me to change. ?

Don't look too deep into this, she has no idea what she wants or needs.

She is seeing OM. And said she is done, has moved on, sorry but that's the way it is. I said ok. I understand.

Don't look too deep into this, she has no idea what she wants or needs.

Told her if things were different and this was a break I would help. She said this IS a break.

I would not (and this is a recent discovery for me as well), she needs to succeed or fail on her own.

She is done.

Don't look too deep into this, she has no idea what she wants or needs.

I will file.

If you feel the need to do so, don't let me stop you. But unless there is a reason to speed through this, let her do the "dirty work". Personally, I would not. Though, it would not be a bad idea to consult some attorneys in your area. *But remember, their job is NOT to talk you out of a divorce... some may even try to encourage it.

Some questions for you:

Have you read DR or DB?
What are you doing to GAL?