Well, as the holidays come to an end I have several observations, a few facts and some possible opportunities.
Observations:
H is much more engaged with the kids and the family. It's incredibly noticeable. S9 is so happy. D6 more confident.
H does not engage me directly or personally. It's very general but much nicer than it has been over the last three years.
Facts He is still in touch with OW - not sure if it's very amicable There was a fight and now lots of missed calls. He used to make an excuse to go smoke and would be away for an hour returning her call. This holiday apart from the above mentioned obvious phone engagements, the most he has been away was for minutes- to actually smoke a cigarette.
On our way home we are transiting through Dubai. He asked if we wNted to stay a couple of days in Dubai. He was going to book me and the kids a hotel room. I said I don't mind going but I don think me and the kids will go if you arnt with us in the hotel.
I meant it not as a threat. H thought about it a few days and then he said today ' so do you want to go to Dubai or stay here ( Europe) for a few extra days. He was willing to stay here for a few days and he was ok with Dubai but would stay in his apartment and us stay in a hotel. He said he would be in the hotel with us until the kids slept then go to his apartment to sleep. I said easily ok then we'll just go back home ( we couldn't change our tickets to stay in Europe a few more days).
So he is not rushing to get back to Dubai - was willing to stay here a few more days and in Dubai but not stay with us in Dubai in the hotel.
Possible opportunity?
He told me to give him a proposal/suggestion about how we can start making things better for our kids. He knows I how I feel about that.
I haven't given him a propsL yet. I have been thinking if this is an opportunity or not. Him trying without saying. Wanting me to lead..? I don't think he is ready. Confused and obviously in some drama with OW while making remarkable steps in engaging with the kids and his family as a whole this holiday. Willing to spend some family time with me and the kids...
I think I should either wait until the last day of the holiday and give a proposL or wait until we go back home and see how things go. Thoughts?
Observations on me
I have grown. I can see what I have moved through and forward from. I am happy and I am laughing again. It's been a journey from He!! And this holiday I can finally see the light at the end. And no one will take that from me again and I wouldn't give it away again. I know there is still more to come... And I am eager to learn more
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
