It's Time to Sing a Brand New Song

[Mimi00]

I don't know if there is a set definition around here for "dropping the rope" maybe someone else can chime in on that?

To me it is an acceptance of defeat when it comes to my H/marriage...
Sure it can be seen as giving up.
I am no longer in a tug or war with my self (because my H doesnt even know there was a battle....his end of the rope was let go the day of BD...hes living life w/o concern for me....he doesnt even know I still have hope for the marriage to be in a tug or war.)

It's not however a defeat personally, I have grown through the process and will continue to grow. I've learned the art of letting go gracefully...and in that sense, I won.

As far as your own rope drop....that would be up to you, but saying you "guess" makes me wonder if you are really ready to? Only you know when you should do so.
You say your wife seems hellbent on getting rid of you.....thats the story of the majority of our WAS' s. So should that be your reason to drop?

The week on BD 6 months ago for me, my H screamed at me to leave him alone and said when he's "done with something (he's) done!" And he hasn't once changed his mind (that I know of) since that day. I could have dropped the rope that day....I made the decision to stand instead and let the process and pain mature me.

6 months later I feel there's nothing else I can learn from this sitch from staying in the same position, holding on would now only be a source of sadness not growth, so I feel its time it time focus on healing and that doesnt include continuing to reserve a space in my brain for H...it cant happen if I am still telling my self he will be back so think positive b/c of that...I have to be positive for me alone. I haven't second guessed my decision.....yet..... lol AS could very well be correct I may pick the rope back up. But i truly dont plan to as of today. I feel my job now is to take what i have learned and share it to help others....time for me to create a purpose for my pain.

Funny, as I was typing this from my phone I got a call from him....I didn't answer.