Wow, quite a story you have Wonka. One thing I notice though, is you both maintained contact and even in each others company for sometime immediately after BD or the seperation. I think what HWA and I have with our wayward W's is almost a blackout type sitch from the get go and without any warning discussion etc. at least in my sitch. This is why I used the term "detest". But I understand you saying they are in pain with their own remembrances.
Even so, they still left without warning and any talks etc. So one can only consider the LBS has to be pretty much detested by the WAS to do so in such a manner. Personally I am ok with it now. It is much easier to move forward without having contact with my WAS since it has been so long now (9 months). I have tried friendly short emails stuff every few weeks and well, I already mentioned the iced over responses.
It would be one thing for her to behave like this if I had been beating her or we had been fighting all the time. But no such things ever occured. We didnt have a cross word for each other almost ever. So if she is in pain today (as you described)and for the past 9 months then options are limited as to why. Ha, maybe she hurts cause she left our 2 lap dogs with me but that doesn't seem logical either...
