Moved Back from Overseas to Figure This Out...

[S4tk]

A few weeks ago I ended up asking her several questions to discern what exactly was going in with her and OM. I didn't post about that conversation at the time because I was embarrassed that I didn't have the self-control to not ask. I knew my friends labug and anotherstander would probably bring the heat.

At that time, she got defensive, told me nothing was going on, and that he was just a good friend. She said, "Do you think I am one of those bit*^es that would have an A and break up their families?"

The next morning, when we woke up and we were eating breakfast, she told me how bad it made her feel that I asked that. She said she couldn't sleep half the night. At that moment, I told her I was sorry she felt that way - and felt bad for her that she didn't sleep. But that is all I said because I didn't really buy the 99% denial.

Flash forward to today.

W is making journals for the kids that they can read when they are older. I had not really looked at them in a while and I took a look at them today. I noticed a third book and opened it. It is a diary she has been keeping since May - entries in her mother tongue to her "precious," "her sweetie," etc.

I looked long enough to know that she did indeed meet up with OM on those trips she took, at least on two of them. Her heart is smitten with OM, and the entries read like Romeo and Juliet - how star crossed her life is, and how it may be a few years before things can work out for them to be together but it will happen. In one entry, she said she looks forward to a time when they can sleep together, live life together, etc. I probably looked for about 90 seconds before feeling the guilt of looking.

I am guessing it would be pretty naive of me to think that their R hasn't gone physical.

He is an old boyfriend, maybe her first love from 20 years ago? They reconnected through social media and in short order it turned into this. I believe I found him online and from his pictures he has two pre-teen girls and no pictures of a W. Maybe widower or D...

W leaves with the kids in the morning for five days to visit her brother in another state. She doesn't know I know anything - just that a few weeks ago I was putting 2 and 2 together in my head. Now it is confirmed that this began several months before BD.

OM lives a continent away, and I believe that neither W nor OM have the means to any regular proximity to each other (right now).

What should I be asking myself? I am lost. Sad. Angry.