WR, I don't think you need to respond back a second time. You've advised him that the bank is working w/your lawyer. That's a sufficient answer. So, if he wants to know more, he now can advise his lawyer and his lawyer can contact yours.
For now, focus on getting better.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
"so I hear you don't care my brother is homeless and broke ......well that is absolutely disgusting behaviour. I am sad to think that you are that type of person. Your marriage had it's problems and they were not going to change so instead of accepting it you are acting like a victim. Ridiculous you are to blame for half of your problems.....grow up no matter how often you ask for forgiveness from your church it won't make what your doing right doing right. Karmas a bitch!"
not my spelling errors btw.
I'm in tears......after EVERYTHING I have done for them. Especially SIL #1.....they've known me for twenty years! 20!!!!! what is he saying to them!?!?! NOW?!?!? HE LEFT US IN APRIL and never a word until now? this? how do I respond? I'm so upset
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
WR, You don't respond. File the text away and just remember...blood is thicker than water. You don't owe them any explanation and one day, they'll figure out what is what.
Your h is been talking trash to them and he wants to play the victim. There's nothing you can do about it. No matter what you say to her, she's going to continue to defend her brother and make you out to be the villain here, so the best thing to do is ignore her and her comments. Consider the source, cry and/or yell, but do not respond to her. You don't owe her an explanation as to what you have had to do to take care of you and your sons.
Can you block her on your phone as well as emails and FB? Do so. Don't give her a second thought.
Continue moving forward and do not allow her to bring you down. Don't allow her or anyone else to bully you.
DO NOT RESPOND!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I won't respond Job......but, I'm really hurt. Upset beyond belief AGAIN! homeless? he's homeless? what does that even mean? why is it my fault?!?!? HE HAS A HOME!!!! He doesn't want it! Last time I actually knew where he lived was May after that I have no idea where he sleeps! Problems in marriage were not going to change? HOW DO YOU KNOW what our problems are and if they could be worked on!?!? I'm to blame for half my problems? I've accepted my faults and have worked(ing) to correct them but MY HUSBAND'S MLC is NOT my fault!!! I accept none of it! Karma's a bitch, eh? I guess it is!
I've been working night and day to keep my kids in their home and food on the table! literally night and day! where has HE been?!??! WHERE HAVE THEY BEEN?!?! OH I'm so upset.....crying and angry and want to just hit them all!
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
I think mlc-ers have an easy path to get family onside.
No-one would ever believe the truth of what has happened, so the re-write of history that forms part of the script is what gets accepted.
It must be that their spouse was controlling, disgusting, unable to be lived with one moment longer, even for the sake of the kids. Whatever else could have led to an outwardly happy family being broken up so quickly and with such finality?
And the poor mlc-er, how he has suffered and for so long. And what he has been reduced to - he has no home, no money, has given up everything....
Again, who, outside of experiencing it themselves, would ever believe what has really happened?
Having said that, IDK if I could cope with not responding - briefly and calmly.
I have, in the past, ignored such outbursts from others who I feel have the 'wrong end of the stick'. I find it festers and makes me feel resentful.
I am also feel sick of 'covering up' the whole notion of mlc.
If only we could say "my spouse is suffering from a classic mlc. I suggest you do some quick reading on the topic and find out how devastating this emotional turmoil/identity crisis can be to those around them before you judge me."
I get what you're saying, NLW, and kinda sorta agree. But here's the thing: Like job posted, H's family will always side with him. Especially after all the BS he has likely fed them. So even the most rational response from WR will be rejected and only escalate things into an ongoing and even uglier battle.
Why sign up for that? Better to just shut up and work on finding inner peace.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
