OMs, cycling, cakes and confusion Oh my Lord ;)

[SM34]

Dobson's view that a successful marriage is built on its finality. As long as one or both partners believes there is an out clause, the motivation to push through the tough times is just not there...

I had asked my wife on one of our earliest dates of she thought divorce was acceptable. Her answer was that if someone is unhappy and has tried everything, then yes. I took it as a reasonable answer, since my 20 year old mind was convinced that if we ever got married she would be happy all the time..and more importantly that she would actually TRY EVERYTHING before throwing in the towel.

Of couse we've all understood thar in the WAS mind they HAVE tried everything. But in our case i think that's sinply not true. She has never suggested we go to counseling, never suggested we sit with some older and wiser family members, or that I should talk to my dad or my mom, or even her dad or her mom to find ways to make her happy.

Which is why I've always felt that my wife in particular was not a disatisfied as some others I've seen here. She had no prior plan for how to take care of herself without me, had not mentioned being unhappy to anyone, had plans for us as far forward as five years etc etc. I feel she fell victim to not shielding her heart from selfish self centered narcissists such as douche OM. Of course she has her complaints about our marriage, but I just don't think it was premeditated, as mant WAS seem to do.

Perhaps soon ill actually hear the reasons from an actual sane wife who is not under the influence of oxytocin, adrenaline, testosterone, etc... that powerful blend that only comes from affairs.