Hey SM - I still tag along on your deal here from time to time. You have made a real amount of progress from when you initially showed up here. Good for you and your family!
You seem to be in an interesting position now - but accuray is quite right - try not to be the rebound if your w is struggling not to be alone. OM seems to be fading fast but you don't want to be a bridge to whatever is next. She has proved that she is capable of doing it once - and as my father once (wisely) told me, once you do the wrong thing once it is much, much easier to do a second time. Wait for her head to stop spinning - and when it does, if she is still there, lovingly suggest you both get help to get things back on track.
With regard to your anger - I totally get it. You, at a bare minimum, want her to acknowledge what your feelings were and what you went through. When my XW came back this past spring for a little while I think I pushed too hard for that. It's not going to come when you want, if at all. You really, really, really have to forgive. Or work at forgiveness - and it is hard, hard, hard work to move past what you experienced. I, too, was left with a little one (he was 16 months at the time) and I was a walking zombie both physically and emotionally trying to take care of him. I had no idea what I was doing. I wanted her to acknowledge that when she came back - it was an unreasonable expectation considering where we were.
