KdogGS' Journey Part Trece

[labug]

Because of my propensity to fly off the handle and get a little hit off the feeling you get from a "so there" response, I've learned to live with my emotions, ride them out, sit with them, whatever works. It's hard work in the beginning. I'll write whatever I think needs to be said, put it away for a day or 2 and then read it again.

Most often my thoughts upon the rereading are "WTH was I thinking???"

The other important piece here is you aren't in control of you. She's controlling you right now. Every thing she says that strikes you the wrong way, you're ready to go to battle. You're constantly reacting.

Everything is not worth a full-on battle, learn to live with your emotions and you'll be in control of you not continuously reacting to every slight, real or imagined.

You'll be a better communicator, a better friend, you'll get your needs met more often and you'll be a better partner.

A favorite teaching:
"Those events and people in our lives who trigger our unresolved issues could be regarded as good news. We don’t have to go hunting for anything. We don’t need to try to create situations in which we reach our limit. They occur all by themselves, with clockwork regularity. Each day, we’re given many opportunities to open up or shut down. The most precious opportunity presents itself when we come to the place where we think we can’t handle whatever is happening. It’s too much. It’s gone too far. We feel bad about ourselves. There’s no way we can manipulate the situation to make ourselves come out looking good. No matter how hard we try, it just won’t work. Basically, life has just nailed us...

Most of us do not take these situations as teachings. We automatically hate them. We run like crazy. We use all kinds of ways to escape -- all addictions stem from this moment when we meet our edge and we just can't stand it. We feel we have to soften it, pad it with something, and we become addicted to whatever it is that seems to ease the pain.”Pema Chodron