Here's what I see in your latest email, you're hurting, hurting bad so you want to lash out and hurt her. She fired a salvo with her emotional P/A jabs and now you return fire.
When you really think about, is that what you want? This is how people end up in the long, drawn out back and forth or ending a marriage. The need to have the last word, to trade hurt for hurt, jab for jab.
How do you think this letter is going to help you other than the momentary, fleeting feeling of "I showed her!"?
Emotions come and go, not all of them need be acted on. You probably drank your uncomfortable emotions away for a long time and now, here they are. When I was depressed I didn't feel a lot of emotion. Then as my depression lessened they all came back. It was scary and painful. I had to learn to manage them.
I noticed that I said sit on the other response for 48 hours but you had to send something that day.
If you are hurting and want her to know that, I'd drop the P/A stuff and just say, "I'm hurting so bad, I can't stand it. I want to be an honorable man and act with dignity but right now I'm finding that very difficult. Let's let the attys handle this from here."
And remember D and property settlements are negotiation and that needs to start somewhere.
Enjoy your Christmas with your family. No plotting revenge over the holidays. ((( )))
Thanks for your wisdom, I know all of it needs to be said, but it will fall on deaf ears. I will most likely end up either a) not replying or b) replying with something very short and sweet that allows me to retain class dignity and honor along the lines of what you wrote.
I did use to drink all this away, it made me numb. Still sober though today.
I know I couldn't wait to reply for 48 hours, but ancient warrior gave me a simple way to respond not out of anger/spite, so I rolled with it.
H: 29 WAXW: 30
Bomb Drop- 9/9/13 Negotiated Settlement- 5/9/14 D Final- 5/21/14 XW has breakdown in attorney lobby- 5/30/14
