Telling the kids about D. Feedback from those who have had this convo PlEASE...!!!!
Told h we should do together. We have had no convo about it yet.(when it is to take place) He is waiting for s17 to finish exams(FRI) They have done a ski trip annually after xmas. so don't know if this weekend or after trip.
Will tell the kids not what I want( they know this) but I love and respect dad enough that if this is what he feels he needs to do, then I will go along.
I don't want to be ugly or fight. I want h's happiness. My kids know I am strong and positive. Our kids know they are loved and this has nothing to do with them.
Gabby's mom, I appreciate your feedback. This sit has been hardest on son 20. He is hurt but struggles with not approving of his dad's behavior and not wanting to alienate his dad.
Who has told the kids?? advice?? Thanks in advance!!
PS, I never knew there were so many of us in this same sit!! Our society has got to wake up!!
I had the talk with my children and it suxxx, I won't sugar coat it for you. My S23 was upset with me because I did all the talking and my X just sat there. My son said why did you tell us it was her desire to leave she should have had the guts to say it out loud.I say upset more like what the heck dad, let her lie in her own bed...
Let him be the one to tell the kids that he wants out. However I recommend that you also do not act like a victim or a martyr during the conversation. I would also let him know that there is no way that burden is yours to carry, that this is his story to tell.
Looking back I should have fought harder for me. Turns out my X stole and hid money and did not disclose it during the D process. I tried being a nice guy and it still got me divorced. I'm not saying to be a jerk, keep DB'ing however if he files then you need to swing for the fences. Protect yourself at all cost. A friendship can be formed later if it is to be.
You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.
