Ambivalent, I sure wish I had some words of comfort to offer you. It's tough and confusing. You do need to eat something even if it's yogurt or cottage cheese, etc. Ice cream would be even better to help coat your stomach so that you don't develop an ulcer or worse.
Sounds like he's not sharing much about the situation w/his family. It's going to get interesting because someone is going to have to acknowledge the gifts, etc. and the question will be will you be the only one signing the card w/your name or will he want you to include him as well.
Did you find the recent tax returns? You will probably need them at some point.
Please take care of yourself. If you can get thru the holidays, that will be one huge hurdle out of your way.
Take care.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
