DIG DEEP DIG ON

[Ambivalent]

Now, about his statement that you can have everything...that was the guilt talking.

Yep, I do know that...and hopefully he will keep feeling those feelings.

As for communication, you will see around the board that mlcers don't give a fig what their lawyers advise them to do. Some will remain in contact and others will be in dribbles.

I do know the more you agree upon the less expensive it is. Dividing property should be something he and I hopefully can do without racking up expenses. But being served will shock him and he may become very angry, especially if she uses abandonment. Up until the mortgage stuff, he has been paying all the bills and maintaining the property.

I just hope it doesn't get him to become ugly.

As for contact, right now he can't face me or even hear my voice, so it will be interesting after Christmas.

When it comes to the snow-blower my driveway is flat, and not that long. It could pay for a bill or consult fee. If I put it out on the front porch, it should sell fast! It's unwieldy for me, and if the house is taken from me, I most certainly won't have anywhere to store it.

Business deal, got it. As for it being about him, yup it is already starting. Albeit late. He's already not as generous with the girls.

I really can't imagine that someone would spend all that money and then walk away.

It seems such a waste. I am trying to wrap my head around just the thinking of , get rid of wife, pay years of support versus, figure out what's wrong and work on it. It seems like temporary insanity and is such a waste of things built over years and a waste of time/money.

I will say when reading True Gritter's thread he said something that just hit me upside the head. It was this:

The thought of going on with life as it was, was unbearable so ....

I checked out.

It sounded so much like my H. saying:

I was unhappy and couldn't see continuing the path my life and our relationship was on. I've been struggling with my feelings about the state of our marriage. I don't like the idea of being divorced yet I didn't like the idea of staying in our relationship even more.

Both sound so myopic. It never occurred to either that there were alternatives. That running away doesn't cure the problems, the problems are carried with you.

That if you don't like a trajectory or path, one doesn't have to blow up the path, or direction, but change things, work through them, become partners in change.

It is true, depression can completely cloud a person's judgment and perspective.